Sunday, November 28, 2010

Are you still having fun..?

Have you ever heard of the verse “Suka-suka akibatnya duka” ?

I’ve learnt it when I was small. It simply means if you kept on having fun, you’ll end up in despair. As easy and simple as that. As I look the people around me and I say to myself, the saying is true. Which brings me to my next point.

That the reason that I love to write and talk in despair and emoness. Cause by the end of the day, I would learn to appreciate life better. You could only endure such stuff till a certain point and there’s two way to go. Moving forward or stagnant in pain. If you work hard for what you believe in and putting all your energy towards your struggle, you would live a better life.

So have a lil fun while you at it, but buck up to secure your future. in the end of the day, it you and your own lfe.

the best way too predict the future is

Going for a trip?

Last Sunday, I got the privilege to catch a movie marathon with my mum. Just accompany her for the European movie festival. It was showing in Mid Valley International Screening. I went for at least 3 movies back to back. And it only cost RM 5 per screening. I was like, what the heck. We did get a chance to have a 30 min break in between for food and prayers. But it was fun. Just FYI, these are consider Indie films that is non blockbuster, and more in the creative arts of visual. No CGI, just pure emotion, camera angle and really great script and story lines. Those what really matters. To make a non blockbuster movie with their own local actors and makes them award winner. We are talking bout Cannes Movie Award (minus all the glam, but more of all the art). I manage to catch three movies.

First one was called ‘Leo’ from Sweden

This psycho drama covers Leo who just celebrated his 30th birthday with friends and family ended up injured as he and his girlfriend stumble into a street thugs. These incident was the thing that causes his girlfriend’s life. Woaw. Think about it. What would you feel if that happen to you? Till what extend would you be calm or to seek revenge. Though everything was in subtitle (as they were talking in Swedish), but the emotion that they brought to the silver screen was a turmoil in emotion. Rejection, anger, revenge, denial, suicide and tons more. The story ended up on a stand still. Which really kept the audience left the cinema thinking. What a beautiful ending. I love these types of movies as they really make you think. Sweet…

Second one was called ‘Until all Eternity’ from Austria

Basically it a love story, with a background a Communism in China. Where a local girl from Vienna, Austria fall in love with a Chinese policemen who went for training in Austria. She decided to go to China and marry the love of her life and stayed there forever letting go her family and future just to be with him. As the story goes, she tries to adapt to the life in China with language barrier and such. As the family grows, the husband has to switch job as they were in war and the communism activist was at large. Eventually he died and left her with all the love and culture that China has to offer. She didn’t regret it a single bit. That’s true love if you asked me.

And the final one is ‘Welcome’ from France

It’s about an Iraqi teen (Bilal) who fled his motherland just to go to UK to meet the love of his life. He was caught at France. So he decided to learn how to swim as the only obstacle to get to his heart was the English Channel. That’s almost 25km distends. Across the English Channel is a real test of endurance and courage as the temperature is super cold… of cause that’s the background of the story. As the focus was the divorced coach who train him to achieve such distant. He was also giving him shelter as he took him as his own son. Which is also against the law. In the end, Bilal was caught dead in the attempt of crossing. The coach later took a flight to see Mina in UK to give her the wedding ring that he gave Bilal. Yeah of cause it wasn’t a happy ending. But think bout the devotion of a war refugee just to go and be with his love one and escape immigrations. When you really love somebody, you go all out. Even if it’s cause you your life.

Enriching movies to sink in my mind. I adore these types of movies really much. As they sculpt arts and culture.

Saturday, November 27, 2010

My eid story

I know this would be wayyyy behind time. but let me describe the recent Eid Adha to you.
wasn't going back to my home town as i have to work on that next day. so on the eve, i wanted to hang out with the crew. udin got xam and need to study, eka was in banting and yasser was MIA.

so i decided to go to USJ 4 to get me some burger. just for your info, they put a certain type of fruit as a part of their salad. so i just have to go to that stall get me some of those. yeah its like across town. but its worth it.

sadly to say, they too close their shop. so i hang out with 'abg best' nasi lemak stall. had a chat and order some food. while waiting for food. i saw a familiar face storming into the car near by. i was wondering is it her..? then as both of them get into the car, they stop and whined down the passenger screen. it was alis and her friend. haven't seen her for along time. chat a lil, then they were off.

several min after that, some one from a passing by car shouted my name. it was Hisham (apit's brother) and his cousin or something. thats another bowling faces that i didnt got the chance to come across for a long time. all those time we had road trip taking te team for outstation competition. he was a helping hand indeed.

after finishing my food and such. as i was about to get up and pay, theres come yasser with two of his friends. i was like, hey, its a reunion....! just that all them came around at diffrent time. it was nice to see some familiar faces. had some drinks at radhi corner then was off.

due to that, the next morning i kinda miss out Solat eid adha. i got the the surau at my place around 815. fail to realized there they start at 8am. hish... bummer... went to the big mosque in kajang, they start 830.

stayed back to the the slaughter ceramony. but usually the done it slightly later. at least i try and make effort to go and watch. well thats my story, how was urs..?

that was my story. hope you had a great one to tell.

Saturday, November 20, 2010

What is sacrifice?

is it letting your dream and passion go..?
to give in to those who are dominaring?
sacrifice time and energy just to get an inch of an improvement?
working on holiday while others are celebrating?
taking the blame for those that is under you?
for a love one?
working long hours so that your family wont have to suffer?

for every single thing that you went through, its worth it...
your effort might not be recognize or notice...
but at least you have a clear conscious in your mind and heart.

"might not be the best, but at least you tried your best..."

have a a great Eid Adha.

I'm ok by Christina Aguilera

Once upon a time there was a girl
In her early years she had to learn
How to grow up living in a war that she called home
Never know just where to turn for shelter from the storm
Hurt me to see the pain across my mother's face
Everytime my father's fist would put her in her place
Hearing all the yelling I would cry up in my room
Hoping it would be over soon

Bruises fade father, but the pain remains the same
And I still remember how you kept me so afraid
Strength is my mother for all the love she gave
Every morning that I wake I look back to yesterday
And I'm OK

I often wonder why I carry all this guilt
When it's you that helped me put up all these walls I've built
Shadows stir at night through a crack in the door
The echo of a broken child screaming "please no more"
Daddy, don't you understand the damage you have done
To you it's just a memory, but for me it still lives on

Bruises fade father, but the pain remains the same
And I still remember how you kept me so, so afraid
Strength is my mother for all the love she gave
Every morning that I wake I look back to yesterday

It's not so easy to forget
All the lines you left along her neck
When I was thrown against cold stairs
And every day I'm afraid to come home
In fear of what I might see there

Bruises fade father but the pain remains the same
And I still remember how you kept me so afraid
Strength is my mother for all the love she gave
Every morning that I wake I look back to yesterday
And I'm OK
I'm OK

such powerful and dept lyric by the one and only. you could even feel the pain...

Saturday, November 6, 2010

Indecisive (Original Rhyme)

it got me thinking, every time you change your mind,
1 day you walked passed, another day you walk behind,
how would you expect, to finish up that climb,
you been walking around in circle, just to find the sign,
clear up your mind, open those eyes that's not blind,
pick your self up, its already half past nine,

after all these years, you've been doing fine,
might not have a lot, but still got food to dine,
because the end of the day, its all about heart and kind,
with all of your triumph, shouldn't be hearing you whine,
as they would kill one another, to have a glimpse what you've find,
so be happy and truthful, that your free and not bind

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Keeping it vague

people always ask me 'why' or 'what the heck I'm talking about' most of the time.. it seems to be very general and sometimes misunderstood by common people....some even say I mumble. Hrmmmmmm..... well this is my honest truth:

the reason why I divert the conversation on a daily basis. Or why I do it in such way is because, I don't want to make it an issue nor do I want to hurt or insult somebody. Who am I in a first place. Just and individual. Not a force, not an authority and not even a somebody. I'm simply the lil one. So I rather bite my tongue and keep my opinion to my self.... so I kept on writing post, shout out and even quotes. Maybe it doesn't reach out to that particular people. But at least its out of my chest. So be it.....

3am by Matchbox 20

she says it's cold outside and she hands me my raincoat
she's always woried about things like that
she says it's all gonna end and it might as well be my fault
and she only sleeps when its raining
and she screams and her voice is straining

and she says baby
it's 3am I must be lonely
when she says baby
well I can't help but be scared of it all sometimes
she says the rain's gonna wash away I believe it

she's got a little bit of something, God it's better than nothing
and in her color protrait world she believes that she's got it all
she swears the moon don't hang quite as high as it used to
and she only sleeps when its raining
and she screams, and her voice is straining

she believes that life is made up of all that you're used to
and the clock on the wall has been stuck at 3 for days, and days
she thinks that happiness is the mat that sits on her doorway
but outside its stopped raining



this is a piece by Rob Thomas for her mum who is battling cancer.